Mary Beth, mother of two teenagers and one preteen knows the temptation and perils of engaging in too many unnecessary battles with her children.

When all of my children reached their adolescent years it seemed as though my life consisted of one complaint or demand after another. First with Kerry, my eldest, I found myself in battles or attempting to avoid battles. It has just intensified as each child has grown older. Sam, our youngest, is now a preteen, Kerry is still a teenager and Agatha, our middle is also a teenager. The potential for a life filled with continuous battles not only seemed possible, it was slowly becoming a reality.

I have read many child-rearing books during my years as a parent. But when my childrens middle school offered an evening presentation on PEACEFUL PARENTING, I knew I had to attend. Peace seemed absolutely necessary and elusive in our home.

Hearing and practicing one piece of advice I heard that night has significantly helped make more peace in my life. When I am about to get into a discussion, or battle, or disagreement with one of my children I ask myself this questions: Is my childs behavior or request life altering or life threatening? If the answer is no then I try and avoid any kind of confrontation.

Now that I have read the book I understand that my children are in more competitive phases of their growth. They all have a greater need for power and freedom. The potential for arguments and disagreements are endless. But now I have a specific question to ask myself that helps me decide to engage in a battle or avoid it. After all, I may not like the length of Sams hair, or the color of Agathas hair, or the style that Kerry has decided to wear her hair, but length, color and style are not life altering or life threatening. Piercing and tattooing are life altering. Riding in a car with a driver/friend who has been drinking is life threatening.

Thank you PEACEFUL PARENTING for helping me discern when to confront my children and when to walk away.