Online dating is finally becoming more like regular dating, as online dating sites are now beginning to appear that facilitate user contact with Skype and similar services. Users have more choice than ever before in terms of the ways in which they wish to communicate. Pretty much all online dating services have an email facility that allows you to contact people directly. It's much more impersonal than other means of communication, and it's the "safest" way to communicate. You can leave an email for somebody and they can receive it some time in the future, which can be very useful at times. A permanent record of the email is usually obtained automatically. However, communicating through email often has its problems. It's quite easy to read somebody's meaning wrongly using email. This is because you have no access to tonal inflections which help indicate the would-be speaker's mood, which would otherwise allow you to detect emotion in the vocal patterns. Sarcasm can be particularly difficult to discern when reading email from somebody. You also cannot easily detect somebody who lies about their age or sex. Also, you don't get an immediate answer to any questions you may pose. The next communication tool used commonly by the online dating community is online chat. This is probably the most common tool employed at present. People type sentences to each other in real time, and essentially have an electronic version of a conversation. Both parties have to be present, and you do get an answer in real time. In all other respects, online chat is similar to email, complete with its advantages and disadvantages. With both of these approaches, it's quite easy to change the communications mode to vocal, and that's traditionally been done by one of the parties deciding to offer their telephone number to the other, or both parties exchanging telephone numbers. Using telephone calls gives you the capability of discerning meaning from the vocal inflections given to the voice, and it's a more effective means of communication than email. You can usually tell the sex, and you may be able to tell the approximate age, of the person with whom you are communicating. However, offering telephone numbers results in a loss of privacy for those who offer them: you have no control over when the other person will call you, and they could do something malicious with your number. Telephone calls are usually difficult to block. With the advent of voice-over-IP, or VoIP, technology, it is now possible to make calls over the Internet. Using this technology is similar to placing a telephone call. Messages can be recorded if you are not available at the time of the call, and if you get trouble with someone, you can easily block their call with most VoIP systems. Services such as Skype are now beginning to offer video-over-IP. If you have a webcam and the person calling you also has one, you can both see each other in real time. This means that you can view the body language of the person with whom you are communicating. Although this usually doesn't lend any additional meaning to the conversation compared with solely hearing their voice, you can see whether the person you are calling is interested in you, or what you have to say, just from a basic knowledge of body language. This is closest in form to a real date, and you will probably achieve greatest success if you can take this approach. |
