Shyness and social anxiety can prevent people from being all they want to be. If you suffer from timidity, you are not alone. Do you have a fear of speaking in front of a group? Are you afraid to meet new people at a social party? Do you get extremely nervous when you are being interviewed for a new job? Does fear overwhelm you when people try to make conversation and you are afraid you will say the wrong thing? All of these fears can prevent you from succeeding in your personal and professional life.

Many famous people have dealt with problems of shyness, including Eleanor Roosevelt, Robert Frost and Albert Einstein, states U.S. News and World Report in the June 21, 1999 issue. They conquered their fear and contributed greatly to our world. Shyness is a set of learned behaviors that interfere with relating to people or having successful relationships, says Nancy Wesson, Ph.D. on her Web site www.wespsych.com.

I experienced debilitating shyness and social anxiety growing up. Timid people often are very sensitive people with great empathy and good intuition, that makes them great friends once they finally make a connection with someone they feel they can trust.

Fortunately, shy people can learn to change these behaviorsthe secret is that they must want to change. They will alter their ways of relating when they are propelled by a burning desire to transform and learn new ways to cope with their shyness.

To break patterns of shyness I suggest trying the following activities:

1. Take a speaking course or drama class at your local community college.

2. Do volunteer work for your favorite charity. You will make new friends and build your self- esteem as you learn new skills.

3. Take the Dale Carnegie Training course on Effective Speaking. This is an excellent program for immigrants as they receive great personal support from the instructors and the participants. Everyone in the group wants you to succeed.

4. Join a Toastmasters International club in your area to practice your speaking and listening skills.

5. Next time you are at a social event, introduce yourself to five strangers. If it feels too threatening, ask an extroverted friend to introduce you to five strangersbut do not let your friend take over the conversation. In order to learn you must be involved.

6. If English is your second language and it is important to you to practice your English, the above five activities can provide an opportunity to practice your English. All of the groups mentioned above will welcome you and support you in your English speaking goals.

I did all of the above activities and practiced, practiced, practiced speaking at the local Rotary clubs, Lions clubs and other non-profit organizations. It was scary at first but I knew I had a message I wanted to share with success-oriented people. I had to overcome my shyness to do it. I did it and so can you. Take that first step today. Pick up the phone and call a friend to support you in your new adventure.