To blame means to accuse someone of doing something wrong. It is very easy to put blame on a person when things begin going wrong and hammer that person left and right for being responsible for all the mess. Let us look at this further. Sometimes, in our personal relationships, when we say that things are in mess, the truth may be different. The situation may not be messy, but our viewpoint may have become messy. What we call as going wrong may indeed be going wrong, but not in the way we look at it. Let me try to explain. Some of us lie. We get caught, or feel guilty. We blame someone for exposing our lie and making a mess of something good. Can a lie be good? We wished our lies to flourish and keep us safe from the bitterness of truth, but our comfort zone got broken because of the exposure. Is this bad? Or our viewpoint was wrong to begin with? When we think more, we find that truth may be very bitter and highly discomforting, but it is always better than a lie. Is it correct to blame a person who exposed our lies? But we do that. Blame the other person for making us face the music. What the other person did was correct but since it hurts us, we accuse. Let me tell you something. What if someone accuses you of crimes never committed by you? What if the accuser himself/herself was the guilty party, but targeted you because you are a soft target? Between a couple this happens. If one of the partners is a compassionate person, the other partner can develop the habit of blaming him/her all the time of all the crimes realizing well, that no retaliation will occur. Many of us act like brutes at times and then we suffer in the guilt for a lifetime. Some of us, who are evil people never, suffer any guilt. But some of us carry the guilt of having done something wrong forever in our life. This guilt will never go, because the deed was indeed done. Why not to desist doing wrong? Why to travel on a wrong path? Why to torture others with blames that they never deserve? |
